Tuesday, May 22, 2007

It's hard work, but you gotta do it!

Romance is a word that is lacking in the male vocabulary, so let me spell it out for you.

R -- If she's not relaxed, that's probably a sign that NOW isn't a good time. Resolve her tension with a back rub or draw her a bubble bath for ONE.
O -- Overtime. Romance is not wham bam. It starts in the morning, when you set toothpaste on her toothbrush, includes a surprise bouquet of flowers sent to her work Just Because, then a chilled bottle of her favorite wine set out to greet her when she arrives home... Put in the TIME and even, The Overtime.
M -- Mandate. Don't play the "But it's been weeks" card. There's no mandate when it comes to romance, even if you are married, stooopid!
A -- Adore her and she will melt in your hand.
N -- Use your noodle not your nob. Your noodle will tell you to turn off the lights, play some soft music... Your nob will sound like a Nike commercial.
C -- Comply. That's right, suck it up, and learn what she wants you to do to make her happy, and in the case of romance, what she likes. If you don't know what that is, find out.
E -- Effort. Even if you can't follow the above advice, usually a woman will react nicely when she notices her man has put in some extra effort.

Ladies, have any tips for the men out there?


Sarah said...

I wrote this article in the POJO, and I think it may help add some spice to a couples romance:

In Search of Great Dates
Poughkeepsie Journal

It's Saturday and date night's finally arrived. But there's already leftover pizza in the fridge. Blockbuster's shelves are less than enticing. The theaters are showing duds. What's a couple to do? Spice things up and take your sweetheart out for a night on the town.

If you're stuck for ideas, don't despair. The mid-Hudson Valley offers plenty of creative date sites. You could tour historic mansions, wander the banks of the picturesque Hudson River, sample chardonnay at a winery, snuggle up at a drive-in, take a scenic flight in a hot air balloon or picnic at the Mohonk Preserve. There's no reason to ever have another dull date.

Hudson Valley Tourism president Susan Cayea said a lot of people go beyond the typical dinner and a movie outing.

''There's a lot of things to do here in the valley,'' she said.

Cayea suggested rafting the Esopus River or, she said, if you really want to impress your date, book reservations at one of the many local restaurants owned by some of the top chefs in the country.

The best idea of all, she said, is to call your local tourism office.

''Residents don't think of doing that, but we have the information to help them plan those really neat dates,'' Cayea said.

Cayea can be reached at 845-291-2136.

You can't go wrong with a trip to one of the historic sites -- a popular destination for couples in love.

''One of the most interesting aspects of our historic sites is the romantic landscapes,'' said Mickelden Smith, director of marketing for Historic Hudson Valley. ''We bring that concept of 19th-century romance to life because you can actually go to these places and experience it, just as people did in that century.''

Staffers best dates

After a romantic dinner at a cozy restaurant in High Falls, my date drove us to a country road in New Paltz, but wouldn't tell me where we were going. He stopped at the entrance to a dirt road that led up to farms in the far distance. Best of all, you could see the Mohonk tower against the the starry background. We parked alongside the road and got out of the car. He set up a blanket in a field and opened a bottle of wine. It was the perfect setting to continue a fabulous date.

- I have to say my best ''date'' place is Norrie Point in Staatsburg. The New York state campground is only a few miles from Poughkeepsie and is a great spot for picnicking, camping and launching a boat. Not only have I enjoyed starlit evenings around the fire, I have had family dates where we departed from Norrie for a day on the Hudson River.

- The first time I took my (future) wife to Minnewaska, she was awestruck. We sat at the top of the falls and had a picnic lunch. What a gorgeous spot and a great way to spend a day.

- He was from Albuquerque, living in New York City, and had agreed to come visit me up here. We both hate outdoor recreation, with the bugs and the dirt and all that sun. But I thought he might appreciate seeing a landscape so different from those other locales, so I took him up to the grounds of the Vanderbilt estate in Hyde Park. We spent a few late-afternoon hours there ... sitting and talking on the scenic hillside, viewing the river and pastoral fields of wildflowers, then meandering down to the riverside and strolling along the water. It was outside, but not too outdoorsy -- a perfectly lovely early-summer interlude for a couple of unrepentant city-slicker types.

- My favorite place to go on a date in the Hudson Valley has to be Rhinebeck. The village is so charming -- walking around it is really a treat. You can't beat the restaurants, especially Mill House Panda and Beekman Arms. For me, there is nothing better than dinner, catching an independent movie at Upstate Films and finishing the night off with a cappuccino at Gigi Trattoria (or an ice cream from Holy Cow in Red Hook over the summer).

- I love going to the drive-in. An old boyfriend and I used to go in his pickup truck. We'd lay out blankets and lay in the flat bed to watch the movie.

Anonymous said...

P - Pleasure me...
A - Adore me...
M - Massage me...
P - Provide for me...
E - Enchant me...
R - Relax me...

yeah... i get it.

only an idiot couldn't see thru this veil of "romance"...

well, most guys are idiots.

stop wiiiiiiiiiiiiniiiiiiiiiiiiiing said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Sarah said...


Why is it that when a woman asks a man to spice it up, do something special, etc., they are attacked as greedy ... ???????? (If you saw the deleted last post you could fill in the blank here)

I'm just not sure that's fair.

Anonymous said...

i'm glad you deleted that previous comment. this is the first time i actually got to see a comment before it was deleted. and while it wasn't exactly vulgar in any way, it was very very stupid.

you see... what did i tell you?

guys are idiots.


Chrissie said...

Why visit a blog that's geared towards women's wants and dating advice/stories and then complain that there are women's wants and dating advice POSTED there???


Anonymous said...

yep it wasn't vulgar or innaproprate at all but sarah won't let anyone else post an opion. because its sarah's little world.

Anonymous said...

i would say it was a bit inappropriate.

a little contention is always good for entertainment... but let's keep it tongue-in-cheekish...

Sarah said...

Feel free to repost your comment, minus swearing at me. I cannot alter the comments, I have to delete them in entire (POJO RULES). Your slave comment was actually pretty funny.

Meanwhile, maybe you have a point, maybe you don't. All I know is I don't blog about the things I do for my boyfriend, to make him feel special, because you would never visit odd couple again. At least if you hate me, you feel passionate to post.

So hate away...

Anonymous said...

i didn't swear, i bleeped it out

Chrissie said...

I have an idea for the men out there...


All the fake-y romance wears off and reality sets in sooner or later, just do what you WANT to do, not what some chick, or your friends, or some blog is telling you.

Unless of course it's THIS blog;)

Sarah said...

It was a rude comment BLEEPED OR NOT. So prove your point, no one is stopping you, just do it without bleeps directed at someone. And if you really want to be a man/or woman, why not put your face and photo to it? Now there's an idea!

Stay tuned for a list of names you can call me in tomorrow's post.

Anonymous said...

On that list of names, make sure "Sara" is not one of them. I think it is SO INCONSIDERATE when people misspell other people's names. I've seen "Chrissy" written in these comments so many times, and every time it makes me want to reach thru cyberspace and slap those commenters and tell them, "it's CHRISS-I-E! What is WRONG WITH YOU MAN!? There is NO EXCUSE -- her name is ALL OVER THIS BLOG! Spell it RIGHT!!"

Uhm.. yeah... so no "Sara", please. Thanks.

Sarah said...

Ummm... OK.

Chrissie said...


I don't understand how people can do that either. It's CHRISS IE with the I E no Y.

Grr again.

Although it's inconsiderate to misspell my name, I am often guilty of not knowing who I am talking to after being introduced repeatedly.

So I guess it's not fair to complain about the spelling so much;)

Sarah said...

At least they use YOUR name and are not calling you names. Call me Sara, Sarha, Chery or Bob for all I care ... Just be nice. LOL!

Chrissie said...

Okay Chery, I'll keep that in mind;)

And a friend of mine told me today that I was "too nice," and that's why people "walk all over me."

So maybe it's better to be "Bob the Jerk" than Chriss-with-a-y and no spine;)

sprinter said...

I say what's wrong with "wanting" to be adored! Who's not looking for that. (It's not out there, but let Sarah dream!)

Girl who's addicted to the odd couple! said...

I am definitely an Odd Couple addict! ;) I think your blogs are fantastic and creative, and I think both ChrissIE and SaraH are very talented writers (I'm sure I've misspelled these names before, and for that I apologize). Chrissie, when are you going to become a commentator? I'm waiting.... :)

I can't believe how angry some people get! I didn't get to see the deleted comment, but GEEZ! RELAX ALREADY! Haha, and I thought I was hot-headed.

If it was a man, most of the time men don't like to be told how a woman is supposed to and SHOULD be treated! They get all offended and say that we ask to much.
But let me ask you this all MEN out there -
1) Who gives birth?
2) Who controls the finances and bill paying?
3) Who predominantly raises the children?
4) Who breast feeds?
5) Who does the laundry? This includes wash, dry, folding, ironing, and delicates if needed.
6) Who does most of the decorating?
7) Who cooks most of the meals? Which most are not 1-2-3 Uncle Bens rice!
8) Who cleans up after these meals?
9) Who keeps track of the husbands schedule, to make sure he's on track?
10) Who works on top of all of this?!

Let's think here, THE WOMAN! Yes, ladies and gentlemen, despite popular belief the women tend to hold the majority of the responsibility when running the household. The women are the ones who hold it all together properly. The woman has most of the burdens!

So why not treat her with extra care, respect, attention, and affection once in a while? SHE DESERVES IT!

Sarah said...

Tell it girl, tell it!

ChrissIE, we need to sign her up and change this blog's name to Threesome!