Tuesday, June 5, 2007
Top 10 Reasons Not to Get Married
1. Think of all the debts you could pay off with that 10 GRAND you dropped on ONE DAY.
2. You will be too drunk to remember it, so all that time and planning goes to waste.
3. Everyone is secretly cursing your marriage and finding fault with your relationship, so why do you want to buy them an expensive meal and provide them with an open bar?
4. Your $2,000 wedding dress could feed an entire village of starving children, OR YOU COULD WEAR IT FOR ONE DAY.
5. That rock on your finger is evidence of bloodshed in the diamond mines.
6. Instead of a down payment on a home, you have a down payment on an article of clothing. Good luck raising your kids in between the white layers of taffeta.
7. Does the word “forever” mean anything to you? F O R E V E R! You're officially trapped.
8. Months, years, of planning are over in 8 hours or less.
9. No matter how much “product’ the salon puts in your hair, it will still fall by reception's end and you will look like Medusa rather than the put-together Mrs. Blank you wish to be.
10. You’ve been found guilty of creating a gift registry. It’s the social equivalent of being outed as a greedy, needy, brat. You’ve actually sent your friends and family on a “scavenger hunt” for your most wanted possessions… shouldn’t “the one,” be enough for you???