Tuesday, July 31, 2007

I hate it when she's right!


The phone rings last night.

"Did u get my e-mail?" she asks, excitedly.

I check. It's a job opening.

"How many times do I have to tell you, thanks but no thanks," I say, repeatedly, during the 20-min convo about why I should move on (aka back home).

A glass of wine later, the headache she caused begins to fade.

24 hours later, it comes back, with the announcement of industry-wide downsizing.

Hmmmm... Is this a sign, I wonder? Or just a coinkydink? because I HATE it when MOM is right!

How do you fend off MOM attack? You know those Sat. 8 a.m. phone calls, when she wants to know if you're eating your carrots and making your bed?

Monday, July 30, 2007

"I love him like a brother" "BFF" and other nonsensical stuff


Platonic love was meant to bring lovers closer to wisdom and beauty. It is described in depth in Plato's Phaedrus and Symposium. BUT WHAT DOES PLATO KNOW?

I agree with Chris Rock's words of wisdom

He said:
Men don't have platonic friends we just have women we haven't ... yet. 'As soon as I figure this out, I'm in there.'

[OK] We have some platonic friends, but they all by accident. They are some women men were trying to ... made a wrong turn somewhere and ended up in the friend zone...

'OH **** I'm in the Friends Zone!!'


WARNING: Once placed in The Friend Zone, one will most likely stay in the friend zone. Attempts made to leave the zone will end up with faces slapped, manlihood damaged, and scratches on your shinny new Acura!
(Read the Ladder Theory for a good laugh!)

Unless said friend:

A) Joins the gym and gets a Beckham body
B) Starts dating someone very attractive, causing friend to become jealous (the whole wanting what you can't have thing)
C) Proves himself to be the knight in shining armor

What do you think, can you get out of the FRIEND ZONE????






“We’re just friends.”

We’ve ALL said this phrase before.

And while it CAN be taken seriously when we’re IN relationships with other people...
It’s sometimes difficult for two SINGLE people to hang out without the social assumption that they are “more.”

Or that they plan to be more…
or that they’ve BEEN more before.


So I have to wonder... is it actually possible for two attractive, worthwhile people to be “just friends” when they have NO significant other to keep them occupied ? ? ?

Or is this inevitably just another game of cat and mouse fueled by the thrill of a chase?

Friday, July 27, 2007

STUFF-O-Cating


I lived with someone. We bought furniture together, we had photos of our vacations on the walls, we had a box of Christmas decorations.

When we broke up, I stayed at the apartment, surrounded by all the stuff and ....


IT WAS STUFF-O-CATING!!!!!!


It wasn't the good times that were going to get me from it'
s over to I'm over it... I needed to APPRECIATE why this relationship didn't work...

So... HIS stuff went into a closet and OUR stuff went into the grrrbage. And when he finally took his stuff, I no longer feared the door would open and spill out the contents of the past, the past was over, and so were WE.

I did make a mistake. I kept a t-shirt or two, but my current boyfriend pointed out that he is capable of keeping me cozy at night. So those too when into the trash can.

AND... there was one thing I just couldn't PART WITH...

I got rid of the dog and his stuff, but I kept the puppy!







Thursday, July 26, 2007

The things we keep


I’ve moved recently, and among the usual clothes and furniture, I realized I had quite a bit of other stuff too.

You know, HIS stuff.

Our stuff.

And I’m not talking about the coffee table his mom gave us for our new apartment or the bed we bought from Sears.

I’m talking about the “memorabilia.”

The photos, the doo-dads, and the gifts that no one else would understand.

When I first moved out of our apartment, I had a HUGE box filled solely with THIS stuff.

It barely fit in my closet and I wasn’t even able to look through it for about a year.

(Okay, okay, I looked through it before then, but not without the tears).

And I was thinking, these objects hold so much “emotion” that maybe the way to rid them of it is to publicly illustrate WHAT was in THE BOX.

So here’s to exhibitionism!!!

1. A kite- A kite from the dollar store that we had bought on our way to Vanderbilt. We bought two, he lost the first one in a tree because the winds were too strong so I tucked this cheap mass of plastic and sticks into a safe place for a less windy day. Apparently that day has yet to come.

2. An empty bottle of wine- Ice Wine, super sweet dessert wine that was bought for me on my birthday. It was saved for a “special day,” which came months later on the night we moved into our first (well, and only) apartment. I will admit now: It was too sweet and I didn’t like it.

3. A jewelry box- Okay, it wasn’t exactly a box… it was more of a pouch stuffed with all the sterling silver I had ever gotten. The best part is that this pouch contained mostly bracelets… and I don’t wear bracelets, I’m not big on accessories. But there was something about these “jewels” that was sweet. Probably because they reminded me of the sort of thing I received in 5th grade from my “boyfriend” who used his lunch money to buy my birthday gifts.

But I was able to do one thing during this move that I wasn’t able to do 2 years ago.

I was able to “downsize.”

That box that barely fit in my old bedroom has been reduced to a tiny shoe box that fits neatly under my bed... ya know, that bed we bought from Sears.

The kite is gone.
The empty wine bottle is gone.
The jewelry… GLADLY GONE!!!

But the frustrating thing?
those memories still aren’t.


So what's in your box????

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

DENY-a-LATER (date)


(He approached me.)
HIM: So what do you do?
I'm a reporter. What do you... (He interrupted)
HIM: How long you been there for?
Four yea.. (He interrupted again.)
HIM: Six months?
(Ouch, I thought).
No FOUR years.
HIM: Years, huh? I thought you were 22.
(Ouch again. No wait! now that I'm 26 that's a compliment).
Add four years.
HIM: Oh, wow.
HIM: So ahhh... I see you're not married. (Oh man) Are you seeing anyone?
(Nervous laugh)
Yes, I am.
HIM: Well, I'm a nice guy, and I'd love to date a beautiful girl like you, so keep that in mind.
(I glanced up at his head of white hair.)
errrh, ooook.
(OK? Who says OK?)
--------
Truth be told, I am a DENY-A-LATER. I lack compassion when someone asks me out on a date. It's like a reflex. Instead of blushing, the room spins, my eyes cloud, and all I can do is my signature nervous laugh.

Once, at a bar, I practically yelled "NO" and fled.

Why can't I spit out "I'm flattered" or "thank you"?

It makes one sorta miss those amateurish notes, where one could easily turn down a suitor with the swift stroke of a pen!

It's called a break up

because YOU'RE broken.

Signs you've gone through a break up that was not so easy:

1. Your coffee table is littered with self-help books to get you through those lonely nights. Unfortunately, these books will also embarrass you months later when you're "so over him," that your new guy picks up "MEN WHO CAN'T LOVE," and laughs.

2. Your hair, which is usually shiny and well groomed is suddenly a mess in need of a trim and highlights.

3. ...UNLESS of course, you want to fall off the "sexy" radar for awhile and you get a new do that's not exactly man-friendly.
(Goodbye flowing tresses, HELLO buzz cut!)!!!

4. Your friends make you mixed CDS of songs you love and stop by your apartment nightly with wine, ice cream and little gifts to bring you out of your doom.

5. You refresh your INBOX repeatedly waiting for the "I'm sorry, let's get back together email," and sleep with your phone in hand.

6. You seek out ANY distraction you can, usually in the form of empty pint glasses.

7. Mr. Back-up is suddenly over with girly-movies in tow in the hopes of convincing you that "not all men are evil."

8. You've revamped your apartment, forgetting the feng shui you used to find so important and instead using this as your guideline to decorating: "REMOVE EVERYTHING THAT REMINDS YOU OF THE EX, EVEN THE MICROWAVE IF NECESSARY."

9. You've either gained or lost 15 lbs. If you've gained, people ignore it. If you've lost, people tell you that you "Look great! Getting rid of HIM was the best thing that ever happened to you." (You however, know that shedding those 15 lbs is evidence of a broken heart, NOT a new found lease on life and your treadmill).

10. You realize that you and Britney Spears finally have something in common, "SHEAR" INSANITY.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket



But what I wonder is this, what do MEN do after they breakup with someone? I just can't picture Mr. Masculine cuddling up with his kitten and a pint of Ben and Jerry's.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

We're on the RADIO



Why SOME men deserve a medal...

  • They skip a Yankees game for a picnic.
  • They make your lunch (and write a love note on your napkin).
  • They do something spontaneous, just to make you happy.
  • You arrive home from work to find your laundry clean and put away.
  • They can't wait for you to get out of work so they can kiss you.
  • They spoil your dog.
  • They rub your hair just the way you like.
  • They borrow your car and return it spotless, with a full tank of gas.
  • They ask, how was work, and listen to your ramblings.
  • They don't refuse to dance, when you're in the mood.
  • They surprise u with a compliment you've never heard before.
  • They notice.
  • They bring up the future, and you're the center of it.
AND, they offer to buy your coffee, when the counter lady won't accept your giftcard. (THANKS FOR THAT!)

A Keeper

I know I’m “capable” of doing it myself.
I know I have my own and that I use it everyday.

And I know, that you know, that I know what you’re doing when you take the initiative and do it for me.

But I’m still a sucker.

I still LOVE when…

You
open
my
car door
for me.

Extra points if you walk a little faster as we approach the car so that you can get there before I do.

Extra, EXTRA points if I see your eyes stray down toward my shoes to make sure “I’m in there all the way,” before you gently shut the door.

EXTRA, EXTRA, EXTRA points if you do this for other women too.

Because then it’s not a ploy to feign chivalry…

Then, it’s just evidence of good man-ners.

And what else could a girl want in a man?

Monday, July 23, 2007

It's hard to make new friends


That is unless you're drunk.

And it's your birthday.

The next day, shame set in.

How sloppy was I? That I just started dancing with females in their own little DO NOT DISTURB groups. I can't even order a cheeseburger without getting nervous!

But it could have been worse:

I didn't wake up in bed w/ one of them.

AND...

No one asked for my phone number.

AND...

It's not like I stalked them on MySpace the next day. Or them me.

SHOULD I BE ASHAMED OF MY SLOPPINESS?

MYSPACE: A place for STALKING


The following is an excerpt from a conversation with SGF, SINGLE GUY FRIEND, on the cyber-dating rules.

SGF: ooo! blog topic time!
what is acceptable activity for myspace / facebook sites, and what constitutes stalking?

me: oooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!
GOOD ONE!

SGF: if a guy meets a girl and wants to friend her - how much time can be spent searching before its considered creepy?
is it fine if he types her name in the search bar?
or is it fine if he searches through ppl who might know her?
and does it mean something different when a guy friends someone he only met once vs. when a girl does it?

me: hmmmmmmmmmmmm i know i feel like a stalker sometimes
GOOD POINT!
because for some reason it does matter...
but men inherently have a creep factor that chicks don't

SGF: i feel like i've stalked just by virtue of having an account... but i often wonder if im crossing any lines
yeah!

me: guys can get all ***EDIT*** and stabby

SGF: *feel like a stalker
hahaha

me: chicks just get obsessive
trying to figure who THAT girl is on HIS TOP 8?!?!?

SGF: guys can be PLENTY obsessive
oh yeah that stuff is annnnoying
and... how many times do you have to meet someone, or how does the meeting have to be in order to properly friend request them?
is a handshake enough to search out someones name and add them?
(i used to do that... but i think thats a bit toooo extreme)

me: yeah that is too extreme
i think you need to exchange numbers at least
maybe more.

SGF: lol

me: ... before you can request "the friendship"

SGF: good criteria

me: "hey, i know that guy!!! FRIEND REQUEST PENDING"
but wait, i KNOW him...
STILL PENDING
expired

SGF: hahaha

me: :)

SGF: if a girl requests a guy after a meeting that wasnt too prolonged, does it imply she could be into him?


Friday, July 20, 2007

How I made it to 25 in One Piece


Or should I say...

A one piece,
bathing suit.

I'd say around the age of 10, bathing suits became a bit of an "issue."
All the skinny, athletic girls jumped around the beach in tiny two-piece suits that showed off their growing bodies.

For some reason...
my shoulders broadened beyond acceptable
and my bottom grew, vertically.

Oh! And you can't forget the soft and doughy, too much estrogen too soon stomach.

I was an aquatic adolescent mess.

Some years later, (thank GOD)! the "tankini" came into style.

It was perfect for that fleshy stomach and I could pretend that I was, in fact, wearing a two-piece like all the skinny girls.

But then came the stigma of the not-quite-thin-enough-chick who WANTED to wear a bikini, but couldn't.

It should have been called the THINK-ini.
I THINK I'm TOO FAT FOR A BIKINI suit.

For 15 years...
15 summers I not only sweat the heat...
but I sweat the stress of a bathing suit.

AND then, (thank GOD)!
I turned 25.

And I realized...
Forget it.
I'm skinny...

enough.
for now.

And I finally went out and bought a suit that flatters MY figure instead of the figure I wish I had.
And it's a ONE-PIECE.

I guess THIS is growing up.

(Maybe THIS is why all the "moms" on the beach wear things that look more like the stuff you see on chubby ballerinas than on swimmers).

But at least I can jump around on the beach and actually enjoy myself rather than WORRY about what part of me is falling out that shouldn't be.

Ya know... like my vertical bottom.
Or my gravity-un-friendly top.
Or my football-player shoulders.

Hell, maybe I'm just OLD.

26...



  • Sum of the 5 through 8 numbers.
  • Letters of the English Alphabet.
  • The number of lbs. I gained since jr. high school.
  • Atomic number of Iron.
  • The No. of Yankee held World Series titles between 2000 and 1923.



And the age I turn tomorrow.



Is 26 a good age?







Thursday, July 19, 2007

Shower YOUR baby



You’ve done it.
You’ve gone and gotten pregnant and now you want me to be all puppies and kittens about it.

I can’t.
I’m sorry.

Your kid, like your wedding, and your new curtains just aren’t my thing.

It’s hard enough to be excited about a friend’s new pet, let alone his/her new "miniature person" that reminds me I’m getting older, “alone-er” and that I’m prone to tension headaches at the sound of loud noises.

You know, like the screaming your “perfect” kid is doing while I’m trying to enjoy my martini and pasta.

So instead of making your friends the "bad guys" and expecting them to offer up the fact your baby just isn't their "thing," take a look at some clues that your friends aren't in the mommy club yet.

Signs I don’t like your "cutesy-woootsey"

1. When you say you’re bringing the baby, I suddenly have a headache and can’t go out.

2. When you ask me to hold him/her I end up with my hands grasped too tightly under its armpits while I try desperately not to let them touch me. (Keep the baby at arm’s length)!!!

3. Babysitting is not something I do… unless you REALLY, REALLY need it. In which case, I’ll call my little younger sister to help you out at 5 bucks an hour.

4. Your baby’s smile reminds me somewhat of that Harry Potter character. You will know this by my grimace rather than my returned smile when the little "Punkin" grins like a jack-o-lantern.



5. I accidentally refer to you’re your baby as “it” rather than him or her. Ooops.



So, how do YOU cope with your friend’s kids, and do you think your actions are evidence of how you’ll be as a parent?

For now, your kids just aren't that interesting

"Kids are the reason they make closets and duct tape."

Disclaimer: I love my friends' kids.

But, I'm just not THERE yet... Sure, I'll hold 'em, but the truth is, this is one girl still waiting for my Mommy Club invite, and at the same time, I'm praying my stork got the bird virus.

Until I experience the pink plus sign plague...

THOU shalt be known that: I just can't relate.

I have never experienced pregnancy cheese (as Karen put it)... AND THANK GOD!

Your "Tommy took his first step" story will be countered with my "Capo went doodie today, and it was a greenish, yellow color."

If you ask me to babysit, your "sleeping" angel may smell like a Mahoney's bartender. (Y should I stay home, if you get to go out? I didn't get knocked up :0 )

I reserve the right to skip comments like "That kids got a set of lungs" and come out with it: "I think it's best that you take him home now."


FINALLY, please remember, that crying, pooping, wild animal you call "baby" is ALL YOURS. At least for now...

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Secrets, secrets

Are no fun...

but telling the truth can also

hurt someone.

The Truth About Deception

Check it out and see why people in relationships lie and why they eventually tell the truth out of guilt.

What LIES beneath Women....


Shockingly, there are lists of things that women commonly LIE about too... So it's only fair...

AskMen.com
says if you think your woman has never lied to you, think again. See if you agree with this site's list of truth distortions!

No. 1 -- The "I wouldn't change anything about you" statement, or the variation "You're perfect." (I'm guilty of this one).

No. 2 -- "Your friends are sooo much fun!" FUN = IMMATURE!

No. 3 -- "Really, I don't mind." No, really, she does mind. So do your own dishes! AND, your own laundry.

No. 4 -- "I love watching sports." OK, so maybe your lucky and landed a sexy TOMBOY. But AskMen says the truth will be revealed. "So, ummm... That MILKY guy is like a really good hockey player!"

No. 5 -- "Your right, I'm wrong." She's really thinking "He'll find out soon enough that I'm right."

No. 6 -- "Nothing's wrong!" (GUILTY AGAIN).

No. 7 -- "It's OK. I understand" during those... ah hem... sexual difficulties times.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Why Men Lie


Monday, on KISSFM, CJ said that the average male lies SIX TIMES during the course of a (first?) date.

Well, I went deeper. I found out what the most common lies men tell women are and WHY they tell them. This according to Reader's Digest RD LIVING:

  • "Me? I graduated top of my class."
RD says: This man isn't comfortable with his own failures and successes.
  • "Of course I like your friends!"
RD says: This man is covering up his opposite feelings with ego-stroking statements that turn out to be total lies.

  • "Honey, you're the best."
RD says: "One of the most lied-about subjects has to be sex." This man knows women's vulnerabilities.

  • "No, I can't call you. I don't even know where I'll be."
RD says: This man is falling out of love (or was never in it).

  • "That dress isn't too tight. It looks great!"
RD says: This man is a good guy, showing he cares. But he shouldn't let these lies become a habit.

Monday, July 16, 2007

Can you hear the crickets chirping on your dates?


Everyone is familiar with the HONEYMOON stage of any relationship... But not so nice is the "Nothing to Say" phase. This is the point in the relationship when:

The familiarity of the "one time, in band camp" stories makes you interrupt with "Yeah, yeah, the flute!"

It's the blankness that stirs in your mind, as you sit across the dinner table from your honey, trying to think of something to say, anything... "So, how bout those Yankees?"

It's the reason why on the phone, you get distracted by the TV set, only to be startled by, "Hello? Are you listening to me? Oh yeah, then tell me, what did I just SAY?!"

Or when you say "talk to me" and your partner responds with "what do you want to talk about" ... which never ends good, right?

One can only hope that the "nothing to say" phase doesn't become the more intense "I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY TO YOU" phase...

What do you think? Is that silence that occurs in long-term relationships a sign that it isn't meant to be? Or is a sign that you are both so comfortable with each other, you can zip it and still be content? After all, you can always bring a book on your dates...

Friday, July 13, 2007

Lose that LOSER


IntimiDATER? Can’t-date-HER-cause-HE'S-a-loser? Who exactly are you going on dates with?

When the types you are attracting have to borrow mom’s car to pick you up for a date and when he's impressed you have your own EZPASS account, INTIMIDATION COULD BE A BLESSING.

When he shows up in his boxers, cause he can't afford pants, and your designer black dress turns him OFF, it could be a blessing.

When your HOTTNESS makes his lip quiver so much he can't go in for the kiss, IT could be a blessing.

I say, flaunt it if you got it. If he thinks he’s not good enough for you, then it’s possible that he knows himself best.

The real question is:
Do you know yourself enough to LET HIM BE A LOSER and ultimately LOSE YOU?

Intimi-DATE who?

Maybe women make EX-cuses when men just “aren’t that into them.”


But maybe there is something to be said for the phrase my friends and I have coined:


It’s the: “I’m-a-LOSER-and-I-know-It-So-I-Can’t-Date-You,” guy.

Come on, I’m sure you know him.

He’s the guy who’s so intimiDATEd by your success that he can’t DATE you at all.

Your shiny new car makes his ’84 Chevy pickup look that much worse.
Your success at work only make his lacking assets more obvious.
And your ability to balance work and a relationship and even friendships points out the fact that he can’t even organize his EMPTY date book.

Sure, he likes you (who wouldn’t?)???
But he can’t let you in because then you’d see H I M.

Ya know, the guy who has less than you…

But even worse than that guy…

Is the guy whose mentality is so archaic that he can’t be with a W O M A N who has her life together.





But maybe it goes both ways... have you ever been the Intimi-DATE-er before???

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

THAT girl


Can't a woman WITH self esteem like the occasional no-strings-attached "romance???"

Why is self-worth always equated with a person's sexual appetite???
This is only ONE aspect of their character, yet it seems to continually define who women are.

I don't think it's necessarily the act itself that gets a woman "attached" to a man.

It depends on the frequency, what else comes along with it, and mixed messages...

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Nurturers vs. Animal Instincts

On Booty calls, submitted by an anonymous commenter:

#5Rule - (Applied to women only) DO NOT GET EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED. It is and MUST be purely physical ...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This isn't The Man Show, this is reality, and I'd say for the majority of women, #5 is where men go wrong.

To say (AND TO ONLY WOMEN) you cannot get attached is pointing out the OBVIOUS...

Women do get attached, DUH! It's our nature to nurture, especially the people who we share a sexual connection with.

Even after a drunken oops, there's that thing called GUILT, caused by purely physical sex.

What do you think, is there such a thing as unattached sexual attachment?


don't bridge the EX gap

Tell it like it is.

A man who builds a bridge to a woman he isn't interested in rekindling a relationship with, has really created a path to her front porch, where she is laid out like a door mat.

* She is emotionally invested. Not ready to let him go, not yet. He (gasp) could change.

* He has already put in the emotional time. It's over, but why not get something else out of all that effort? At least till something better comes along...

It's in WIKIPEDIA, titled THE EX-SEX, next to drunk dialing and casual relationship.

TEAR DOWN THE BRIDGE

-- Booty calls are like vampires, appearing in the night and disappearing before it becomes light again.

-- You end up naked just moments after he arrives and ALONE just moments after that.

A MANMADE bridge occurs when there is a gap between two people, a gap that is THERE in your best interest.

Burning bridges

Long ago, a commentator on our blog pointed out that men may striiiiiiiiing women along for one reason.

They don't want to "burn any bridges."

(Ya know, those bridges who's lights burn brightest at 4 a.m. on a Saturday night).

So is there any truth to this fact???

And if not, why else would a man keep in contact with a woman he has no interest in?

I think women are often guilty of constructing bridges that should have been torn down long ago, we bridge the gap between what WAS and what we really WANT.

And maybe that's the biggest problem...

Instead of providing passage, we're creating a barrier instead.

Monday, July 9, 2007

The party that you aren't invited to


How do you juggle a new relationship and a deep-rooted friendship?

When I've fallen hard, I'm embarrassed to admit I've dropped the ball(s).

I've tried the whole "come with us" thing, but in the end, the third wheel becomes more like the flat tire... that drags behind.

The 3rd wheel becomes:

-- The person who rolls her eyes when you tell her all the cutesy things your man does for you.

-- The person who is a constant reminder that there's a party on Friday night, that you are missing for a quiet night at home.

But, when the newlywed phase fizzles out, it's that person who comes to your rescue and puts the air back in your tire.

Dane Cook's take on the 3rd wheel:
When you don't have love, it's like there's a party going on, and everybody was invited, except for you. And you just happened to be walking by that house in the rain... (sigh) "I wasn't invited to this party." But then, once you're IN love, that's like being inside that party, going "Where's my jacket? I wanna get outta here. where's my jacket?"

The Wheels on THIS bus...


3rd wheel, 5th wheel
HELL, I've literally been the 9th wheel at one time.

But driving that "social-car" with an odd number of wheels is an art to be perfected.

(And you'll get to take your road test MORE THAN ONCE I'm sure).

As the odd-woman-out you've got to remember to follow your own set of rules in order to make sure all those couples are "comfortable."

1. You can NEVER point out the fact you're alone with disdain... this will only lead to pity faces followed by the "I'm so lucky to have you" faces, both of which will make you SICK.

2. You must be content to dance alone, or be sandwiched between "that couple" who is only trying to make you feel better about being alone.

3. You are responsible for ALL interesting conversation. After all, "the couple" now lives vicariously through your single-life because their pizza and movies aren't all that great to talk about.

Sure, you're the one chatting hilariously about your life while they can only listen and hold each other's hands...

But they still get to go on thinking that they "lucked out" and they secretly can't wait for you to find "the one..."

If only for their own comfort levels.

So even if you feel like you're in the PRIME of your life and you're enjoying every minute.

The only PRIME number that's EVEN...
is 2.

Thursday, July 5, 2007

Call it a tie





WHY IT SUCKS TO BE SINGLE: CLICK

WHY IT SUCKS TO BE TIED DOWN: CLICK



PDAs


When is it time to keep your hands to yourself?

I was always been a "fan" of PDAs.

At least I was... ya know... when I was IN a relationship.

But now that I find my self sans-boyfriend, the canoodling and cuddling makes me nauseous.

Is all that hand holding necessary?
Will you really miss him THAT much when he gets up to use the restroom during dinner?
And is that 25 minute hug goodbye a MUST??? He's going HOME for the evening, he's not flying off to war.

Maybe I'm bitter.
Okay, I am bitter.
But there has to be a certain "standard" that can make all the happy couples content AND one that won't tick off the jaded old maids.

What are the "rules" of appropriateness when it comes to public displays of affection?

Vote

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

Monday is my day

In response to Chrissie's post, I think that many long distance relationships are doomed from the start. Why drive 100 miles, when there is a whole pasture next door of free milk?

But at the same time, any healthy relationship needs some distance. When it comes to Chris, Monday is MY day. My day to do laundry, grocery shopping, and spoil my dog rotten. My day to read till midnight, watch a chick flick, or do absolutely NOTHING. It's for me to decide. I don't have to say, "What's for dinner?" or "What do you want to do today?" Monday is my distance.

Come Tuesday, there's no one in the world I wouldn't want to be with than him.

Sometimes we need that reminder.

Tuesday, July 3, 2007

The perfect length

How long is too long of a DISTANCE for a relationship to work?

I’ve seen friends drive HOURS to see their boyfriends, and I’ve heard others complain about the 45 minute ride home.

I’ve wondered if absence makes the heart grow fonder or if absence makes the heart grow fonder for other people

You know, those people who live closer.




So I ask, what ARE the secrets to making a long-distance relationship work?




And more importantly, what are the SIGNS that the relationship itself is speeding on the freeway to OVER???

Monday, July 2, 2007

She's got legs ... and tight shorts!


Heels & Short Short Shorts, what's up with that?
It's like Sporty Spice and Sexy Spice collided.
It's like peanut butter and tuna.
It's like Basic Instinct meets Hoosiers.

It may work on the runway, but then again, what doesn't work on the runway? (Maybe this)

I was inspired to discuss this trend by a group of young girls at Shadows, who looked like street walkers, not club goers! I just don't agree with it.
Then again, I am still angry at the plastic belt around the waist look.
Guys, is either sexy? Is your type sexy, sporty or sexy on top and sporty on the bottom?
The Your Type of Girl Test
(It said my type was sorority girl. As If!)


I guess it could be sooo, sooo much worse. Look at what these designers have in mind. This girl belongs on all fours in the desert.