Friday, July 20, 2007
How I made it to 25 in One Piece
Or should I say...
A one piece,
I'd say around the age of 10, bathing suits became a bit of an "issue."
All the skinny, athletic girls jumped around the beach in tiny two-piece suits that showed off their growing bodies.
For some reason...
my shoulders broadened beyond acceptable
and my bottom grew, vertically.
Oh! And you can't forget the soft and doughy, too much estrogen too soon stomach.
I was an aquatic adolescent mess.
Some years later, (thank GOD)! the "tankini" came into style.
It was perfect for that fleshy stomach and I could pretend that I was, in fact, wearing a two-piece like all the skinny girls.
But then came the stigma of the not-quite-thin-enough-chick who WANTED to wear a bikini, but couldn't.
It should have been called the THINK-ini.
I THINK I'm TOO FAT FOR A BIKINI suit.
For 15 years...
15 summers I not only sweat the heat...
but I sweat the stress of a bathing suit.
AND then, (thank GOD)!
I turned 25.
And I realized...
And I finally went out and bought a suit that flatters MY figure instead of the figure I wish I had.
And it's a ONE-PIECE.
I guess THIS is growing up.
(Maybe THIS is why all the "moms" on the beach wear things that look more like the stuff you see on chubby ballerinas than on swimmers).
But at least I can jump around on the beach and actually enjoy myself rather than WORRY about what part of me is falling out that shouldn't be.
Ya know... like my vertical bottom.
Or my gravity-un-friendly top.
Or my football-player shoulders.
Hell, maybe I'm just OLD.