Monday, July 23, 2007


The following is an excerpt from a conversation with SGF, SINGLE GUY FRIEND, on the cyber-dating rules.

SGF: ooo! blog topic time!
what is acceptable activity for myspace / facebook sites, and what constitutes stalking?

me: oooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!

SGF: if a guy meets a girl and wants to friend her - how much time can be spent searching before its considered creepy?
is it fine if he types her name in the search bar?
or is it fine if he searches through ppl who might know her?
and does it mean something different when a guy friends someone he only met once vs. when a girl does it?

me: hmmmmmmmmmmmm i know i feel like a stalker sometimes
because for some reason it does matter...
but men inherently have a creep factor that chicks don't

SGF: i feel like i've stalked just by virtue of having an account... but i often wonder if im crossing any lines

me: guys can get all ***EDIT*** and stabby

SGF: *feel like a stalker

me: chicks just get obsessive
trying to figure who THAT girl is on HIS TOP 8?!?!?

SGF: guys can be PLENTY obsessive
oh yeah that stuff is annnnoying
and... how many times do you have to meet someone, or how does the meeting have to be in order to properly friend request them?
is a handshake enough to search out someones name and add them?
(i used to do that... but i think thats a bit toooo extreme)

me: yeah that is too extreme
i think you need to exchange numbers at least
maybe more.

SGF: lol

me: ... before you can request "the friendship"

SGF: good criteria

me: "hey, i know that guy!!! FRIEND REQUEST PENDING"
but wait, i KNOW him...

SGF: hahaha

me: :)

SGF: if a girl requests a guy after a meeting that wasnt too prolonged, does it imply she could be into him?


Sarah said...

It's so true! I was on MySpace last week, looking at someone's page to confirm that they were truly the tool I pictured them to be, and it backfired. I felt like the tool. I said, I bet MR. TOOL doesn't go on my page to make fun of my movie tastes.

Chrissie said...

Movie tastes is one thing...

My friend was seeing a guy she MET through myspace a few years back and we went on his page to scope him out.


At least we got a new way of saying it out of his idiocy though, "I lik scary mOIves," is a joke we'll have forever.

Thomas G Henry said...

I think "befriending" means that this person is or will be in your life for some duration. If there is no implication beyond the "friending" that this is the case then it will feel forced. Sometimes pushy guys get friendly chicks. Sometimes chicks think pushy guys are creeps.

Bottom line is... what's the IRL past tell you about the IRL future? and does the "friending" connect those dots? or is it out of line?

and sometimes... u gotta color outside the lines... with ur balls.

s'how I see it.