Monday, July 30, 2007

“We’re just friends.”

We’ve ALL said this phrase before.

And while it CAN be taken seriously when we’re IN relationships with other people...
It’s sometimes difficult for two SINGLE people to hang out without the social assumption that they are “more.”

Or that they plan to be more…
or that they’ve BEEN more before.


So I have to wonder... is it actually possible for two attractive, worthwhile people to be “just friends” when they have NO significant other to keep them occupied ? ? ?

Or is this inevitably just another game of cat and mouse fueled by the thrill of a chase?

13 comments:

Sold my Audi cause the backseat was Dirty said...

Well...I'd say that depends on this:

Just say your boyfriend has a "friend" that is a hot single girl....Are you cool with them going to the movies while you are at work?

I think this works in only one instance...if the girl/boy was a close family friend from the time the two were babies or very young....to the point where it would feel like making out with your sibling...(on both sides)

Chrissie said...

So Mr. Dirty Audi, are you saying that single HOT people are a threat whether a person is in a relationship OR NOT?

I tend to be too trusting... I've let my ex-boyfriends hang out with my friends (most of whom are hot) without me present...

And sure, MY first boyfriend is living with my best friend of 20 years now... and another EX advocated polygamy, so I'm not the one to ask:)

But I want to know if two SINGLE people can hang out as FRIENDS, that relationship stuff is for Sarah!

Sarah said...

If you can't trust your TOTALLY HOT best friend with your boyfriend, like I can (and DID this weekend), then you NEED TO DITCH THEM BOTH!!!

Sarah said...

Two single people --- just friends? Hmmm... I guess it depends on how lonely they are. Notice I said lonely and not ALONE. These are TWO different things.

ALONE = comfortable & content with you on the couch, pint of ice cream, sat. night, stroking fluffy.

LONELY = You alone, going through your myspace friend list, thinking who you could tolerate a hookup w/

So, yes two ALONE people can be friends.

BUT NO, NO, NO, two LONELY people cannot be just friends.

Chrissie said...

MAYBE Sarah, but I think two hotties that are ALSO content with being alone sound like JUST the sort of people who are ready for a relationship:)

Sold my Audi cause the backseat was Dirty said...

not necessarily a threat...it depends on how the two people view each other:

e.g. I have a pretty friend who is married w/kids but we grew up together and I think kissing her would be like kissing my sister (whether she was married or single) and I'm not moving to Walden any time soon...

but...

2 single hotties who meet through a mutual friend...I find it hard to believe that neither of the two wish is was more...

Chrissie said...

I found in my "research" (thanks google) that your idea seems to be a common sentiment SMACTBWD...

If it's someone you've known for a LONG time, since childhood/high school, then it's easier to consider them "just friends," probably because you developed relationships before the hormones got involved.

But once there's some testosterone in the equation that "Best Friends Forever" idea has a new obstacle.

vanessa said...

From experience I'd say that yes its possible for single men and women to remain "just" friends with no hooking up involved. HOWEVER, I do believe that at one point in the relationship one or both parties will definitely develop more than friends feelings for the other. Whether or not this eventually passes and/or one of them acts on it is quite another story. My best friend was male and for about 3 years we were practically inseperable... and no hooking up or even kissing. And every person that asked what was up with us didnt believe that there was no hanky panky. We eventually drifted apart when I found someone... and I think we originally became friends because we were lonely and had no one to talk to.

Sarah said...

I think I could fall in love with an old kindergarten friend easier than a stranger... because of the history and the bond.

What if your DOCTOR pal or your playground kissing partner grew up to be a BECKHAM? Tell me you put him in the FRIEND ZONE, I dare ya :-0

vanessa said...

Also, I think its A LOT easier for people to remain in the friends zone if they arent your dating "type". But the more time you spend with someone the more likely you are to develop feelings for them. But thats just my belief.

Chrissie said...

Vanessa, I think you're right... there is at least one part of "just friends" duo that wants a little more eventually but "real friends" can work through that.

I guess it all boils down to physical chemistry, if it's there you're "screwed" and if it's not you're friends:)

Sarah said...

And if the chemistry is ONE-SIDED, YOU ARE TOTALLY SCREWED

breathe0420 said...

I'm trying the whole bff thing with my ex of 6 years. Definitely sucks because surprise surprise... I'm still in love with the jerk! I think it's possible however, because if you really try hard enough you realize that friendship is the only thing that really matters.