Tuesday, September 11, 2007

What happened to the ancient art of eye contact?

Why are people trading in face-to-face meetings for instant messenger icons? First impressions to profile views? Trading e-mails instead of swapping phone numbers?

What's wrong with meeting your mate traditionally?

I just don't believe that a dry spell can be cured by Cupid.com or eHarmony, even if they do have Dr. Phil, mainly because the virtual world is filled with representations of who people wish they were. In the virtual world, I'm 5'8", thin like a Cheez-It, and I have two nostrils of equal size, instead of one the size of Hunter Mtn. and the other the size of an M&M.

Shut down your computer (after you've finished reading this blog, of course)... I have a BETTER idea!

You don't need cyber space, you just need some old fashion eye contact. Ya'all know, I didn't invent this smooth move, but I did master it!

The method:
Step one: PREPARE for a night out as if you were going on a date with the man of your dreams, even tho you haven't met him yet. Take the time to actually curl those eyelashes, blow out your hair, pick out clothes that make you feel on top of the world.

Step two: When you make your ENTRANCE at your event, plant a confident smile on your face that says I'm single and happy. Make sure you don't go overboard. You want to feel like Jennifer Love Hewitt in Can't Hardly Wait, not Jaime Pressly in Joe Dirt.

Step three: Once you feel your self-esteem soaring, you're ready to SKIM THE ROOM for someone who grabs your attention. When you spot him, send THE SIGNAL, with eye contact. 3 RULES: Glances not stares. Smiles not drool. Confidence not stuck up.

Step four: If he smiles back and continues to glance at you -- and you are pretty positive there's no girlfriend in the picture -- approach him or create an opportunity for him to approach you. E.g. he's standing in a bathroom line, stand by the bar nearby. E.g. he goes outside to make a phone call, accidentally bump into him as he re-enters the room.

Now get on out there, because an avatar will never take the place of a REAL MAN!


Sten said...

I think you have a good point with online dating, however, getting decked out and hoping to meet a nice guy at a bar isn't ideal either (though obviously not impossible).
I am not on any online dating sites, but I would never rule it out as a possibility. When out at a bar you tend to judge only by physical appearence, never taking the time to "say hi" to anyone you don't immediately feel sexually attracted to. Online, there are the silly old blurred photos, but you also get a glimpse into the person's head through their profile.
I am a big fan of eyecandy, but would rather be with someone who makes me laugh than someone who only makes me drool.

Chrissie said...

I have to agree with Sten, if I could count the number of times I've done EXACTLY AS YOU'VE DESCRIBED Sarah... it would be in the thousands.

And sure, I meet men, I get numbers, even dates (I usually cancel), but although I think following your advice increases your odds, I'm under the impression that there is ONE thing that can help us find "the one."


If the timing isn't right, even Mr. Right won't work out.

(But, you definitely increase your chances of influencing "timing" by being out and goregous instead of at home and miserable).

Sarah said...

Good points Sten. I too, have dated guys who haven't looked like male models on the outside, but have wowed me by what's inside.

In the end tho, I realized that relationships lacking mutual physical attraction stirred up issues and one major conclusion: We are better off friends. I crave intimacy.

Sten said...

Chrissie - I totally agree timing can make or break any possible relationship.

Sarah - I would never downplay the importance of chemistry and intimacy. Maybe I am just underwhelmed by the men that come out to bars in Poughkeepsie.
I was out at a diner last night with some friends watching the tipsy after hours crowd stumble in. I swear they all looked exactly alike and acted like monkeys. Only monkeys are cuter ;).