Tuesday, October 2, 2007

Why Men Think Women Love Jerks

"I'll take a Bud light" he told me.

These were the words of someone who obviously watches the Pick Up Artist. Mystery's No. 1 dating advice -- establish you are a jerk within 1 second.

It sure was effective. I shoved people at the bar aside. I waved my $8 in the air at the bartender. "HEY, this adorable, single man needs a BUD LIGHT!" I cried out. We exchanged glances of utter hysteria, and the cold brew was in his clutch in no time.


That was how it played out on the male-skewed (and delusional) TV show. But as real life would have it, Mr. Blue Shirt got the "Do I Look Amused" face, followed by two words: "Beat It".

You see, in my rule book, Mr. Thirsty With No Money shouldn't approach girls and make first-impression demands, no matter how many episodes of VH1s "How to Get Slapped" he's viewed. I take my instruction from the "Why Men Marry B*tches" 10-step program.

Step No. 1 -- NEVER, EVER serve a man a beer, unless you are going to get a big tip.
Unluckily for him, I wasn't wearing my waitress apron that night.

Why do guys (like this one) think women love jerks???


Jared said...

I dunno, empirical evidence maybe?

Obviously not all women love jerks. But ones with low self-esteem seem to. And the same women are the most likely to engage in one night stands and booty-call type of relationships that the pickup artists are looking for. Alienating you isn't a failure, it's part of the screening process.

Sarah said...

So you don't think there's any chance he just ran out of money and needed a beer? (Me Neither!)

But if I was this guy performing this test, I would have gone for something more expensive than a bud light!

Chrissie said...

i think some women like jerks for the same reasons that men marry b*tches...

jerks and b*tches have a certain confidence.

confidence is attractive.

it's a bigger thrill to have the jerk or b*tch want you than the person who likes everyone...

i dunno.
i'm sick of jerks.

Sarah said...

Am I the pot calling the kettle a jerk here?

Jared said...

Maybe he wanted to show that he had no taste and no class, in addition to being a jerk? We've started referring to it as "Bad Luck".

...Although in all honesty I probably haven't gone a week without having a Bud Light in 5 years or so...

I think Chrissie's post makes a great point. I think another side to it is that relationships will never work if one person is letting the other walk all over them, and "jerks" and "b*tches" won't allow that to happen.

Sarah said...

I'm just going to throw this out there (feel free to disagree). It's sortofa feminist rant, be warned.

I think guys have been using the response "but women like jerks" to continue living up to the low dating standards they have created and THRIVE in.

Let me correct! No woman wakes up in the morning and thinks, "I need a jerk like I need a cup of coffee."

Most women who date jerks see something that is not there or buried deep within. We think we can change a bad boy (we don't want to keep him!!)

Or some women are just so injured that they don't know how to spot a wolf in sheep's clothing.

But these aren't reasons to allow this "you knew I was this way when I told you to buy me a bud light" crappola to continue.

It's NOT human nature for him to be a jerk and you to like it, it's HIS ploy.

Jared said...

Sarah, I understand what you're saying, but to make another tired men/dogs analogy- It doesn't matter how much you yell at a dog if you keep feeding him treats every time he's bad.

Sarah said...

I'm glad we both agree men can be trained to behave with treats!

Jared said...

Yes, we do.

PracticalHappiness.com said...

Even though it becomes universally accepted that women like jerks, it doesn't seem to be entirely true.

Women like great guys who have certain qualities that jerks are known for as well (sarcastic sense of humor, deciseveness and playful lightheartedness), but... no woman with a fair and above degree of self-respect, self-esteem and dignity will want to be affiliated with a jerk on a romantic level.



Anonymous said...

Sarah...are you and you BF fighting AGAIN? Everytime you get into it with him you start bashing men. Geez "RELAX"

Sarah said...

You can chalk this up to a tiff, but C. and I are madly in love. I gotta wonder, is this some bruised ego defense mechanism?

She's just an angry female with an ax to grind, so her points aren't valid?

I'd rather hear your opinion on the topic than a flawed inference about my love life.

Barberian said...

Men think that women love jerks because:

1. WOMEN REALLY DO LOVE JERKS: they LOVE the idea of someone being an asshole TOWARDS ANYONE BUT THEM. When the jerk starts being jerky towards his woman, she starts whining.

2. NON-JERK MEN NEED CONSOLATION FROM THEIR SOLITUDE. When masturbation is the only option, you need at least to console yourself with the role of the noble victim (from which no woman will ever take you out).

Ergo, women never find good men, and good men never find good women. Get used to it. Amen.

d3f111163@yahoo.com said...

Pick-up artists aren't like you're guy there.

Times are changing. Girls are becoming the man.

To get an idea of this I recommend reading the blog http://www.BecomingAPUA.com