Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Babies make me go BOOM!

My brother and his wife are pregnant.
I should be happy. I mean I am. I mean I should.
But there is a bump on my shoulder, that has sprouted a tail and a pitch fork, making me feel extremely agitated.

"Your brother is going to have another kid. You don't even have a husband. What is wrong with you?" it torments.

I plug my listening holes and hum "La, La, La" in my head. But the bump becomes more fierce.
"In 3 years, your brother fell in love, got married, had a son, celebrated his 1st birthday, and is pregnant again. And you. Ha! What have you done?"

I whip up my best cheery voice and call mom.

"Did you hear? I love all these babies," she said. The pitch fork jabs me in the eye as the bump devil taunts "Not you. She's not talking about you."

Babies babies every where. Babies babies pull my hair. Babies babies all around. Babies babies make me frown.

Poor C. I pointed the fork at him.

"I have good news," I said, with bitter sarcasm. "My brother is having another kid."

And then my tongue turned into a loaded cannon.

"Looks like my dream of having at least one kid grow up with his cousin is shattered!" The bomb whizzed through the air. "Do we have any wine? Because I'M NOT PREGNANT, and I feel like having the whole bottle."

I saw the gun smoke, but shame stopped me from blowing it out.

It was not a kill to be proud of. More like a suicide.


Chrissie said...

I think being an "awesome Aunt" will help you be an awesome mom when your time comes... so just keep that in mind:)

Vanessa said...

I think Chrissie's right.

My bf's sister is only 2 years older than me, and she already has a house, a great career, a good husband, and 2 gorgeous kids.

It makes me a little envious and I'm like wow, why cant I have that. But I know I can, and I will, someday. Just not NOW.

I believe If you want something bad enough, you'll get it. BUT NOT WITHOUT A LOT OF HARD WORK.

After being around my niece and nephew, I've mantained that I still LOVE kids and I do want them, but maybe not as soon as I'd thought.

There's the crying, the tantrums, the sticky diapers, the puke, and the weird feeding times and sleeping habits.

I figure they're a good practice run, and when I do decide to have my own, I wont be flying blind.

Madelena said...

Aww Sarah!! Your maternal instinct is kicking in I see. :)

I hope the wine made you feel better; or at least took some of the edge off. It does help in situations like this.

I don't know C., but I can understand your frustration, and I think you have a right to be upset. You're ready for the next step, and you seem like a good woman/catch so he needs to get his butt in gear!!
Hopefully that feeling will kick in for him soon too ..... sooner than later.

Anonymous said...

you're an adult. stop competing with your siblings.