Wednesday, January 23, 2008


We went searching for a "Couples Record Book" to bring us closer together, and what we found was an arsenal of questions bound to start a war.

Forget questions about your first date, first kiss, maybe even first "fight..."

These particular pages were littered with questions like:
-"How old is the youngest person you've slept with?"
-"Do you sometimes wish you'd had more time being single?"
-"If you could change one thing about your partner, what would it be and why?"

Maybe I'm simply not "open-minded" enough to have this sort of discussion with my significant other...

Or maybe I just know how to avoid tension, anger, and jealousy.

While this book hoped to promote discussion, all those questions seemed to do were promote discomfort, discontent, and dishonesty.

But is there ever a right time to stop sharing?
Or does skipping that chapter just prove you're not ready for the book of love?


Vanessa said...

The "Couples Record Book" that you described sounds like a very SCARY thing. It would most definitely cause some friction in any relationship new or otherwise.

I personally do not want to know anything more about my S.O's dating past than I already do. Even though it happened before I even existed in his life, I would still be wrecked with insecurities and jealousy. Which is also why I have never asked "How many people have you slept with?" The only thing that matters is that I am the last one he will ever sleep with. :)

Chrissie- What you need is a relationship scrapbook. Then you two can decide together the important/silly things that you want to document and remember. Instead of responding to questions some stranger wrote and the two of you dont care to know. I think it would be much more meaningful that way.

Sarah said...

Obviously this book believes that couples shouldn't have ANY secrets, but I am a true believer that sometimes you hurt the people you love when you tell them too much.

Many I'm just biased because I am obsessed with scrapbooking.

Another option: Do a couple video diary. Tape a short narration after or before important events.

Chrissie said...

oooh! your video diary thing is a really cute idea!!! and the idea of a real scrapbook came up too, but that's so much work and i was hoping for an easy way out.

i think there's something to be said for being "honest" about the things that matter, but certain things don't matter to me...

why would i want to know "the age of the youngest person he was with?" and that wasn't even the worst question in there, some weren't exactly "blog friendly..."

they just seemed like the questions that would later be used as ammunition in an argument, like "Well I'm SORRY, maybe you should go date a 19 year old again then!"

cute: "what attracted you to him/her?"
bad: "what do you find least attractive about him/her."

i guess i'll have to relearn to love stickers and glue if i'm going to record anything:P

Vanessa said...

wELL ACTUALLY... I think Michaels sells "pre-made" simple scrapbooks and all you have to do is add a note and picture... i have always loved the idea of scrapbooking, and have some of the supplies. I just never feel like doing it when I have free time.

Vanessa said...

Ohh, I just had an idea.

Maybe you and a friend should make it a tradition to get a bottle of wine and "girl talk" one night a week while you work on your scrapbooks together. HINT HINT.

Chrissie said...

ooo vanessa that's a fantastic idea...

let's just hope that some BFs know enough to buy those scrapbook kits for their less than rich GFs who want to make them such a lasting gift;)