Friday, February 15, 2008

Breaking up is hard to do... well.

Breaking someone's heart isn't supposed to be easy, and we can only hope that if our loved one wants to start a new life, that they end the one we shared with respect and tact.

But just like Carrie's "Post-it" note from Burger in SATC proves, people don't always take our feelings into consideration when they can only think of getting away and moving on.

While the POST-IT "I'm sorry, I can't, don't hate me" might take the cake for most insensitive mini-letter, there are some new and UN-improved ways men and women are ending their relationships sans emotion.

1. Via Email: I can personally attest to this one, I believe that "technically" I was the email-break-er-upper, but the response was also via email... and so the end of a 3 year relationship took place between Hotmail and Gmail, both of whom eventually lived happily ever after (with other people).

2. Disappearing Act: After days, weeks, months of dating, POOF!" Suddenly, "I'm going out for a jog," entails NEVER COMING BACK. (The BEST is when they disappear on your Birthday).

3. Myspace: It's the "Place to end many friendships and relationships." Rather than send a private message, a few people choose to leave "break up comments." Or the less obvious and equally awful, change of status from "in a relationship" to "single."

4. Moving: Forget just going out for coffee without returning, how about packing up your belongings and CHANGING TOWNS! (This scenario seems necessary only when a restraining order is involved).

5. Text Messaging: It's inappropriate for "making dates" and it's inappropriate for canceling them as well. Even worse though, is the "I can't do this anymore" message received at 3 a.m."

While you're ON vacation: You're about 6 hours from home and you realize, "I can't do this anymore." Unforutnately, if you SAY THIS WHILE YOU'RE STILL IN PENNSYLVANIA then you'll have to suffer the long ride home listening to the sobs of your partner rather than your favorite songs. Save the "we're over" for when you get home, or you may end up taking the bus and seeing all your clothes lost on the thruway.

"The worst way he/she broke up with me was when ____________________."

1 comment:

warrior pacifist said...

"The worst way he/she broke up with me was only 3 months after I moved/drove-all-the-way-with-my-whole-life-packed-into-my-car to Washington State for her."
Talk about the wind changing direction.