Thursday, March 6, 2008

Put down the hair brush, Give this guy a hammer!

"Honey, you might want to sit down, I have something to tell you," my boyfriend told me.
"Are you wearing my bra again?" I asked, trying not to show the agitation.
"Umm... no."
"You used my razor, didn't you? I saw your leg hairs in the tub this morning," I said.
"Maybe, but that's not it either," he replied.
"I know. You got your AXE deodorant on my favorite black dress again."
"I didn't know how to tell you," he moaned.
_________________________________________________________

Ok. That convo never happened. C. is in construction. His hands are calloused. It's one of the first things I noticed, and loved, about him. He wears blue jeans sexier than a cowboy, and his toolbelt makes my lower region tingle.

But this moment did really happen. It's the reason why I need a man who looks good hammering away on a roof :

"How do these jeans make my butt look?" my brother asked me.
"How am I supposed to answer that?" I said, refusing to open my eyes as he waved his tuckus in my face. "It's fine, ok? It's great. Now get out of room!"
"Can I borrow some of your coverup? I have this zit..."
"GOOOOOO!" I demanded.

Yup. That one was real. And ever since that day, my brother has been in Metrosexual Therapy.
We had this intervention a few years back where we cut up all his button downs and confiscated his man purse. "Noooo! NOT MY HAIR GEL!" he screamed in his sleep for weeks.

Unfortunately the shock treatments couldn't reverse these genetics. The first thing he asked the doc post-electricity was "Will the current give me split ends?"

What do you think is sexier?
A guy who can swing a tool...
Or a guy with a healthy do.

3 comments:

Chrissie said...

physically i think the tool swinger is "sexier," than the guy with the man purse and perfect hair... but i find that i have little in common with the "MANLY MAN" type.

and not just because i'm a woman... i think the more "traditional" men come with more traditional expectations of women as well, and i don't exactly fit their mold of perfection.

i can tolerate the hair products and the hair mascara as long as he isn't prettier than me, and he still has a few super-masculine attributes i can focus on when he's PMSing over his pimple:P

jovial_cynic said...

Given that the issue is preference and not some kind of an objective valuation, I'd like to offer my male perspective.

When it comes to women, I'm much more drawn to an athletic woman than I am to a skinny woman. If a woman can sprint a lap, or throw a good left-hook, or hit a baseball, that instantly increases the appeal. Not that I prefer a muscular woman -- that's not it at all. I just think that there's something attractive about a woman who can play hard and not cry over a broken nail or a skinned knee.

"PoJo Princess" said...

Besides being forced to rate my own sibling's buttocks, I don't quite grasp why I need a guy's guy.

Or why I always thought "dark" men (Italian/Puerto Rican) were much more appealing than the albino boys. Or why they were always, always potheads. I loathe the stuff.

Or why R. dated a woman with male parts in college. Now she likes em Irish and irritable :1

It's just how it is, I guess.