Tuesday, April 1, 2008

The season of my dreams

Ah Spring. We've been waiting for you with such joyful anticipation.

I almost forgot how a thunderstorm makes sugar plums dance in my head,

how a warm breeze before a storm reminds me of napping near the ocean,

how a cooling rain pairs with an evening jog like wine with a meal.

It seems like yesterday, I was snapping shots of winterscapes.

While I rode in a heated car, bundled in a wool coat and fuzzy mittens.

But even then, Spring whispered it was near.

Spring said to me, what you've really been waiting for is almost within reach.



Spring is like the nice boyfriend who introduces you to the man you're going to marry.

Do you agree?


Chrissie said...

i totally agree...

and marriage is much like the summer in that it's something you look forward to forever and something that you love...

but it still gets on your nerves on the hottest of days when you quietly wish, for just one day of winter (or single-hood;)

Anonymous said...

spring is better than summer. spring is full of anticipation, potential, growth, newness, the promise of a better tomorrow...

summer just is what it is. it can't get any better. in fact, it can only, inevitably, go downhill from here.

i live in a perpetual spring. or try to. some people call this "not growing up". they're probably right. but to me, happiness is found in its pursuit. actually "reaching" it leaves me feeling tired. hollow. empty. purposeless. depressed. it's the feeling i felt after my graduation. it's the feeling i imagine newlyweds feel the day after their wedding (at least, it's the feeling that i feel for them the day after their wedding;). people may construe it as a feeling of "satisfaction". that's fine. i can agree with that. i've felt satisfaction before. but i've come to realize that satisfaction isn't all it's cracked up to be. to me, satisfaction is what you feel just after you've crested your happiness. it's the moment your happiest days shift from ahead of you to behind you. from your future to your past. and it's all downhill from here.

maybe i'm just a perpetual pessimist. i could agree with that too.

sarah said...

I think I'm always in pursuit of what's next, so I don't have that "crest" that you describe.

I do have a fleeting sense of sadness when a grand event has passed, but then its on to the next...

Chrissie said...

well anon, i think this is one of the MANY reasons i hate my birthday (and most holidays for that matter).

and i've always been one to say it's better to want than to have...

and i think the only thing that gets those newlyweds through day one and afterward once they end their wedding day, is as sarah puts it, what's "next."

for most of them, it's a baby... and with that they can say they have a lifetime of newness and changes to look forward to.

i think it's the people who don't want kids who feel that pang the hardest...

Chrissie said...

but maybe our feelings can change over time...

i know that i used to love the REALLY REALLY hot days of summer. the days that the air was so thick i could barely move and the only thing to help was a long swim or an icy drink to sooth me.

i could have thought at that moment that "this is it, summer is here, i'm satisfied and it's the beginning of the end."

i could have mourned the loss of summer as soon as i really felt it.

but in time, those hot days weren't as enjoyable and i noticed this most recent summer that i was looking forward to fall.

even more so than i had been looking forward to summer...

my "peak of perfection" wasn't the "end" after all... it wasn't insurmountable for me anymore.

i enjoyed the warmth but i longed for something different.

and i think maybe it's that longing for something different, something more that keeps us happy "the day after the wedding" or the day after our "graduation."

Anonymous said...

i agree with you both. and i don't want to be misunderstood here. just because the graduation and the wedding represent "peaks" over which we surely must slide "downhill", i don't mean to imply that we shouldn't have those "peaks". we should have them. we should welcome them. they represent significant moments of our lives (even if we do feel sad when they're over with).

i guess the larger point i was trying to make was that happiness is more often found in its pursuit than in its achievement.

i.e., in the "next" thing, as you say sarah. or in the "something more", as you say chrissie.

so i think we all agree on this... one big happy springtime ball of agreement.

btw, this is all validated by recent neuroscientific discovery. the brain is healthiest when it is learning new things. we feel better psychologically when our brains are healthy. the brain learns new things thru novel experiences. hence, we are happiest in the pursuit of new things. A implies B. B implies C. therefore A implies C. have a nice day.

Anonymous said...

Fall takes it all.