Tuesday, October 28, 2008


Every once in awhile I get the single girl itch.

(And no, I'm not talking about the one you can catch from a not-so-clean boy).

I'm talking about the slow, burning itch that means you need to GET OUT OF THE HOUSE. You need to dance like no one is watching. You need to paint your nails while watching Nip/Tuck. You need to drink copious amounts of stoli-vanilla and diet coke and spend the good part of Saturday morning/afternoon looking for your car... like you used to.

Like I used to. Before.

Before him.

Before us.


Chrissie said...

Comment and let me know how YOU get your single-self back when the relationship doldrums settle in.

Unfortunately, I find that those things that used to be so fun, simply aren't anymore... Instead of going back, I want to go forward.

But what comes next?

Anonymous said...

skydiving. skydiving comes next.

i luuuuuvvvv skydiving

Sten said...

Staying single has kept away the doldrums for me ;)

But seriously...
I always found it helpful to have one night a week where I went out with my friends.
Once in a while I'd take a mini vacation with my best girl, or drive out to Boston to visit college friends.
As long as you have something that is separate and just for you, that will breakup the monotony of monogamy.

Chrissie said...

ah! anon... i'm afraid of heights.

and i hear ya sten about having your "just you" time while you're in a relationship... i've definitely got that.

i think i might be referring to the state of mind a person is in when they are no longer single. even "free" or "alone" time isn't really alone, because your actions have consequences for two people.

i may not be making sense... perhaps i just need a girls night;)

Sten said...

No, I think you're making perfect sense. One of the reasons I suggested the mini vacation with a friend is that during those couple days you might feel more like your decisions are your own - you decided what sights to see, what you feel like eating, how late you want to sleep in ... just bring him back a postcard.

Dj Lady said...

you can still go out for a night of dancing and drinking ( you just can't flirt with every slimy guy that hits on you--- though free drinks are a plus!!) that's what trusting the other person is all about. they trust you not to do anything stupid. girls night out is a much needed thing ( plus it keeps you in touch with your pals!) and a great time would be-- 80s night in new paltz!! since we don't have much of the nasty slimy guy things that go on at other bars.

Colin said...

This is a guy's perspective, so I don't know how much it will help, but the girl and I have figured out that it's perfectly fine to take time away from each other to go hang out with our friends, be they single or in a relationship. We tried the whole "set a day" thing, but found that it was tough to nail down one day a week when it would be easiest for us to get our respective friends together. As it is, I work odd hours, so she gets the weekend nights to go out if she feels like it. I tend to take Sunday evenings as my own and go to the range with my shooting buddies. The key to keeping the doldrums from ruining things is to remember that it is perfectly okay to do things on your own. Just because you are a couple doesn't mean you're bound at the hip like conjoined twins. You don't have to go everywhere together, and it's perfectly alright to go party, dance, drink, and have fun so long as you don't start crossing boundaries that shouldn't be crossed.