Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Sten's Top 10 Wish List

Chrissie's post got me to thinking about what a guy could do or say that would really peak my interest. While neggin' would certainly start a conversation, being a nasty little boy won't hold my attention for long.

So, in honor of the holidays just around the corner, I give you "Sten's Top 10 Wish List of Things That Would Attract Her to a Man."

1. Yankee Fan. This is just good taste and upbringing.

2. Win an argument. If he can debate me to silence (because he's stumped me, not just pissed me off) then he must be incredibly brilliant ... or lucky ... in any case I would want several opportunities to reclaim my pride.

3. Fear of Jupiter. As a child I would lay awake at night pondering the vastness of Jupiter. So many times the size of Earth with unimaginable storms raging for hundreds of years. There is no "ground" just toxic winds that would whip you around for eternity until you plummet into a molten mercury core. Terrifying. If a guy could understand and maybe humor this somewhat irrational fear ... I'd be smitten.

4. Good winker. Not cheesy. A good, sexy, well-timed winker. It's just hot... like he knows something I don't. And I should take the time to find out what it is.

5. Ability to turn of the light without leaving the bed.
It's getting cold at night, so if we're already in bed, and the light's still on ... I'd be pretty impressed if he could take care of that without leaving me to shiver. Getting coffee without getting up in the morning would be super too.

6. Distrust of Canada. I think we've all seen South Park and their honest portrayal of those beady-eyed flappy-jawed neighbors to our north. Those lures of draft-dodgers. I was once in a little town up there where the streets were lined with tulips and the pedestrians on the sidewalks all smiled and said "hello" as I walked by. Nice cover-up maple lovers. I'm on to you. Hopefully the object of my affection will be too.

7. Intimate serenader.
Some girls like sweet nothings whispered in their ear ... I'm a sucker for a soft crooning in mine. I don't even care what the song is. "Row, Row, Row Your Boat," can be sexy if sung sweetly against your temple.

8. Playful to the point of silly. I want to laugh and smile and not feel self-conscious if I say or do something stupid. This requires that he says and does ridiculous things at times as well. I will definitely taunt him for it, but in reality, I'd find it so endearing.

9. No bull crap.
I like a man who's upfront and honest. No games, no playing it cool. If I like him, I want to know that he feels the same. If I need a decoder ring to figure him out I'll get bored pretty quick. Those were dumb CrackerJack prizes.

10. Loves bears. Bears are my favorite animal. Not Teddy Bears. Real bears. They are adorable ... oooo look at the cute little bear! Bam! It's eating you alive. Fantastic. I love it. If a guy tells me he love dogs best, I'm walking away. If a man can show me a bear holding a shark ... well, that would be a dream come true.


Sten said...

Tell us what weird little attractions you have ...

chuckles said...

Macguyver and I were having a random talk about a bear fighting a shark yesterday or the day before, is this in something, haha, or does everyone just think about a bear fighting a shark? I mean it happens all the time in nature.

chuckles said...

Any kind of artist. Any creative juices get my juices flowing if you catch my meaning.

Snarky ballbusting behaviour, giving it back as good as you get. There is no substitute for good chemistry, especially when you're rapid firing quips and silly comments back and forth.

Unbridled excitement, unrealistic delusional dreams, I like to see myself in girls, no pun intended.

Sten said...

You also have had an unhealthy string of affairs with mirrors. They may stare at you adoringly, but still.. they are so tow-dimensional.

I think a bear could take on ANY animal in a fight. Paws down.

But there is a special place where you can find a bear holding a shark ... you get brownie points for finding out where.

Macgyver said...

Why can't your blog tackle the hard-hitting questions...

like this:


Sten said...

I definitely stated that a bear could take any animal... including a shark. Wiki is backing me up here. Mind you, I'm referring to a polar bear or grizzly ... although, pandas know kung fu...

Wraith said...


aka the Ralph Man said...


A Shark could take out a bear in water though...

I like Strong women who at the same time under their exterior are Sweethearts that are kinda Sleazy (or extra sleazy).

A woman that likes to play fight and wrestle and smacks or punches me for unnessasary groping.

Hmmm, kinda nerdy or intellectual is good (sometimes sexy???) but to much is to much... an dumb "Pop Music Clubers" and "Shopaholics" are kinda wack.

Oh wait I like women with poor social graces, manors, and behaviors who don't give a damn... that's a good one

uhhhh Shorties, Cuties yeah

aka the Ralph Man said...

oh yeah... an women that have at least experimented with a drug or two are always cool

ratdreams said...

it's spelled "pique," not "peak"


go yankees!

(did I just win your heart?)