Monday, March 9, 2009

Playing with the boys


"Sorry Chrissie, the other girls won't get here until after 10."
"That's okay," said my man, "She can hang."

And so hang I did. With the guys. With wrestling on TV and beer in hand, I infiltrated guy's night an an attempt to get closer to my guy and his interests.

But sometime in between "renouncing marriage" and "grabbing another cold one," an issue of Playboy ended up on my man's lap with instructions for him to open it.

Let me tell you this: I am no prude. I've seen/read/re-read more than one issue of Playboy and I have no problems with my man enjoying a subscription.

But what I've never seen is it brought out family style at a social gathering.

"Hey, could you pass the chips and let me see that naked chick again?"

I pointed out how fake her _____ were and how flat her bottom was. To which I was told, "You're ruining this for me."

And all I could think was how a man would feel if a chick brought out her most recent issue of "HUGE MEN IN THONGS" and threw it on the lap of a newly engaged gal saying, "Check out page 17, he's AMAZING!"

Would those guys not find the comparison uncomfortable? Would they not instinctively feel as if they were being compared to perfection or is that only a result faced by women striving to meet a particular standard?

I couldn't help but feel like I wanted to disappear.
Because her bare body sprawled across his lap made me feel naked and vulnerable and the room full of men who were starring at her aroused only my discomfort.

As the pages were turned one of the guys exclaimed, ""I was anticipating her to look better!"

And all I could think was how he wasn't the only one expecting more.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

They sound like a bunch of morons. I'd like to see them whip that out in front of their wives!Most likely wouldn't happen. They seem to have no kooth,(sp)...or common sense.

Jared said...

With the degree of editing and airbrushing involved, comparing yourself with a centerfold makes as much sense as comparing yourself with Jessica Rabbit.

Chrissie said...

well jared... after viewing a picture of me sten once said, "you look like a real-life version of jessica rabbit in this picture!" so maybe we compare ourselves anyway... however unrealistic;)

but, the post was less about the 'comparing' factor and more about the appropriateness of what happened and whether or not it would be viewed as "ok" if it was a Playgirl rather than a Playboy.

i have a deck of playing cards from my single days that could easily garner a XXX rating... but i don't whip them out for everyday company.

Jared said...

The inappropriateness is the whole point. Guys have to be appropriate on some level in every other life situation other than hanging out with their male friends. Then there's no boundaries whatsoever. At least until the cops show up. This is the only way we can deal with living in civilization. The fact that you were somewhat offended means that they were on the right track. Now, you might say that they should have cleaned up their act since you were there, but is that really what you want?

Anonymous said...

Sounds like guys just being guys. Its an issue of playboy, who cares?? I think that you should be flattered that they feel comfortable enough to treat you like on the guys. You never are going to change the way that they are, no matter how rude and disgusting at time they may be! The reaction just solidify if they are going to hide it from you or not. Guys are always going to look ay nudie mags, check out internet porn, look at pretty girls when they are out and talk about them with their friends. Its just normal male behavior. If you show displeasure, it doesnt mean that your man is going to stop, or his friends: they will just be secretive. You are better off coping with the nasty implant photos than dealing with shady behavior.

Anonymous said...

Every time I act inappropriately, I wish someone would say, girls will be girls.

Look. The fact is, having a penis is not a badge to act rudely. I do think wiping out PORN in a group setting with mix sexes is rude.

Mario said...

A man would likely do the same thing you did: disparage the model. Only rather than pointing out some physical shortcoming, a man would be more likely to insist the model in Playgirl was gay.

But a man wouldn't feel as uncomfortable being compared to the models in Playgirl as a woman might feel being compared to the models in Playboy.

However, as an experiment, you or any women reading this could try the following. Then next time you have one man in the company of a group of women, pull out an issue of Fortune or Forbes and start cooing over some young go-getter who takes his woman out for expensive evenings in an expensive automobile.

I don't think men necessarily want the women they see in Playboy; and I don't think women necessarily want the hotshot they'd see in some magazine; but I think the scenario I've described above is on par with the one you've described.

If you try it, let me know.

Sten said...

Oh Mario ... you give some of us WAY to much credit to think we'd have such classy mags laying around. What if I try that with my cowboy calendar?